“You killed my cake!”
Since tomorrow is Father’s day in Australia, I naturally leave any thoughts of some kind of present for my dad till the last minute. This morning before work, mum reminded me to get him a present. “Get him some socks!” she said (I didn’t tell her that I think socks are an awful present to give to my father, I just didn’t get them.)
Over the years we’ve given dad all sorts of presents for his birthday and Father’s day. One year we gave him an engraved cigarette lighter (which kind of gives off the idea that we condone his smoking - which we don’t) that he never used. Another year we bought him an electric razor. Guess what? He never used it! One birthday, I think someone gave him a G-string. (I hope that’s never been used as well.)
It was only a couple of hours ago that I thought, “OK, I’ll bake a cake! Dad loves cake!” I pottered around the kitchen, cracked my eggs, melted butter and stirred cake mix. It made me feel quite matronly and homey actually.
The real disaster occurred after the cake came out of the oven and finished cooling down. I dragged a knife around the edges of the tin and flipped it upside down onto a plate.
Nothing.
I did it again. Nothing.
“Here, let me try,” mum grabbed the cake tin from me and banged it on the kitchen bench three times. My cake flopped out in bits and pieces all over the bench.
“YOU KILLED MY CAKE!” I yelled in Cantonese.
“It’s just a cake, Tracey,” She replied in English.
“YOU KILLED MY CAKE!”
“You’re saying it wrong! You can’t say it like that anyway, it doesn’t make sense!” Then she grabbed a bit of cake. “Yummy.”
Trust my mother to turn the murder of my lovely Father’s day into a criticism of my shoddy Cantonese.
“Your dad won’t care anyway. As long as it tastes good, he won’t care how it looks!” Mum laughs at me when I glare at her.
# Belinda, 1 year, 2 months ago.
My mum constantly laughs at my crappy Cantonese too. I always get my syntax mixed up and pronouncing words weirdly. x_x
# Amber, 1 year, 2 months ago.
That reminds me of Dobby in the Chamber of Secrets with Petunia’s lovely looking cake. I’m sure it tasted lovely anyway! Did he enjoy it still?
# Chans, 1 year, 2 months ago.
Look at it this way: A cake will be in pieces when you start eating it anyway. And if it tastes good there really isn’t a problem :D
# Kat, 1 year, 2 months ago.
So Amber is reminded of something from Harry Potter (surprise surprise :P ) and I’m reminded of that scene from Friends. You know the one where Chandler and Rachel drop a cake on the floor and still eat it? That would make a great picture, you and your family on all fours eating cake off the floor ^_^ I’d do it for good cake!
# Jennifer, 1 year, 2 months ago.
That’s like me spotting a huge ass rotting/bruise on a fruit and her going, “IT’S OK, YOU CUT IT OUT AND EAT IT. IT’S JUST A TINY BRUISE.”
A TINY BRUISE THAT’S DOMINATING THE WHOLE LEFT SIDE OF THE FRUIT? YEAH HUH, NO.
:|
Happy father’s day anyway :P I’m sure, uh, he shares the same mentality as your mom.
# Lisa, 1 year, 2 months ago.
Awww I totally get that you wanted it to be pretty, too! If you’re anything like me then your mom is probably an awesome cake maker herself so it’s easy for her to say as she’d have made it look beautiful ;) But hey, I’ve been told many times that men really don’t care what food looks like as long as it tastes good (sugar and grease = good as a general rule) and fills ‘m up. So I’m sure your dad loved it anyway.
# Ramsha, 1 year, 2 months ago.
At least you can cook. Mine would probably have turned out burnt from the oven itself because I forgot the baking powder or something.
Did he still enjoy it, though?
# :: jozjozjoz ::, 1 year, 2 months ago.
I’m sure your Dad will enjoy your cake (even in bits and pieces) more than the electric shaver!
# Rilla, 1 year, 2 months ago.
Lol the argument is so cute. My family is constantly laughing at the way I say things in Mandarin incorrectly as well. But I’m sure your dad enjoyed the cake. :P I mean, I can eat ugly things as long as they’re tasty.
# Jenny, 1 year, 2 months ago.
You know, my dad is EXACTLY like that. Except he ALWAYS asks for socks, and my mum and sister (i.e., the ones who buy the presents) are like “No! That’s rubbish!” whereas me and my brother just make “deals” with him… you know, I scratch your back, you scratch mine. But not literally. Haha.
My dad always laughs at my Cantonese; I have successfully mastered how to say “I’m hungry.” “Is there any food?” “I’m REALLY hungry.” though! Tones and everything? Perfection.
Says my mother, anyway.
And I’ve rambled far too much about myself. :3 Must stop doing that!
You should have taken pictures.
Tracey + kitchen =
:P
# Tracey, 1 year, 2 months ago.
Kat, I so don’t think we’re going to be eating any cake I bake off of a floor :P
Oh my god, I really suck at all the tones and stuff in Cantonese. Every time I try to say something my mum looks at me funny and says “you meant *insert word here* right?” and says it properly. And I don’t care if you ramble about yourself in comments, I do that all the time!
# Chanel, 1 year, 2 months ago.
Socks! That reminds me of my dad… He always wants socks for Christmas instead of “useless presents that will go straight to the garage in a week” - practical man, he is. :P
I’m sorry to hear about your cake :( Did you grease the pan beforehand? Even those dark non-stick kinds can be tricky sometimes. Be sure to grease it no matter what, just to be safe.
Your mother was right, though - As long as it tastes good, he probably won’t care what it looks like. Men are like that. The last time I baked a cake, my father cut out a huge chunk of it while it was still cooling (i.e. no icing or anything) and thought it was “absolutely delicious”.. But as a suggestion for cake-gone-crumbled, you can always put the crumbles in a bowl with some fruit and drizzle some chocolate sauce on top. It’s still a dessert!
# Rafia, 1 year, 2 months ago.
Well, it’s the thought that counts, right? Speaking of Father’s Day, which isn’t for another year in the US, I can’t remember the last time I got my father anything. I think a simple “Happy Father’s Day” does the job, so I’m sure your father will be (was?) more than happy that you went through all that trouble!
I almost never speak to my parents in our mother tongue, only when I joke with my father… but he’s laughing at the way I speak, he never stops to correct me. I actually wish he did, though.
# Amanda, 1 year, 2 months ago.
You know, he probably has worn that G-string.
# Tracey, 1 year, 2 months ago.
That’s so gross I don’t even want to think about it.
# Kaisa, 1 year, 2 months ago.
G-string? I don’t want to imagine anyone father wearing a G-string! EWW!
# Jessica, 1 year, 2 months ago.
At least you put more effort into Fathers’ Day than I did! I asked Dad what I should get him, and he said, “I don’t want anything for Fathers’ Day except your company.” So that was exactly what he got. :D
# Amber, 1 year, 2 months ago.
Tracey! I’ve just noticed that you have a sexy new favicon. :P